An identical entry found in Manraj Patil’s and Shivmohan Singh’s personal logs. A date and time could not be firmly established as both of them were lost to the rest of civilization while in the middle of a quest for a Time Buying Formula.
It started after wily Pranab Dasgupta decided to go down under while packing Don Karat to Chennai to see young Mr. Muthuvel. Shivmohan and I were told by Madam Sphinxlike Silencia to start once again looking for a Time Buying Formula.
This time it was going to be different I told Shivmohan.
We can no longer rely on the logic of public pretensions.
We could have gotten away with Dubya given his limited intellect but Don Karat is a different animal. In his dictionary there is no distinction between “intentions” and “acting on those intentions”.
Madam’s sphinx like silence is not helping anymore. This deal now requires a nuclear option.
So where do we go to shop for a time ?
Shivmohan hit this brilliant idea as I was lost in a soliloquy staring away at the emptiness of the space-time continnum.
Shivmohan said – Let us get Einstein’s brain !
The solution eluded me at first till Shivmohan explained that . Einstein’s brain was removed within seven hours of his death?and? sections had been preserved in alcohol in 2 large mason jars within a cider box for over 20 years.
With Einsteins brain in?a jar, immense new?possibilities now opened up to my eyes. When only a few moments ago I was staring at empty space time now I was looking at relativistically speaking a googol number of options to stall Time.
But the first step was to perform brain surgery on Shivmohan, he was not that bright anyway, constantly praying for more Intelligence. Well who knew destiny would smile on him in this manner for not every moron gets to trade his brain for Einstein’s.
The surgery itself was painless and within minutes Shivmohan was explaining to me why fastening seat belts didnt make much sense while driving at the speed of light, there was one problem though well actually two. Shivmohan was now speaking in German. But that was the lesser of problems. There was a bigger problem Shivmohan’s less gifted original brain had failed to anticipate.
Here we were trying to buy time to wriggle out of a Deal with the great Satan while Madam Sphinxlike Silencia was agonizing on hurting Muslims sentiments, and now we are stuck with Albert Einstein’s Jewish brain in Shivmohan’s head.
Now compute the quantum effect this would have on Secularism, with the Indian Home Minister’s brain having turned zionist and communal.
But it was too late and there werent too many brains to trade Einstein’s for and Shivmohan got down to work on a new Time Buying Formula.
This one would be bigger and better than Theory of Relativity he claimed.
So what exactly did Shivmohan compute ?
I have no idea for now I am in a parallel universe after racing at the speed of light. Time to me has pretty much stalled. There are no signs of threats from Don Karat here. There is something unnervingly familiar about this place lulling me into a false sense of security.
It must be the all pervasive sound of silence.
Hell, I am stuck in Sphinxlike Silencia’s limbo !
Filed under: Fiction
Your posts are comin thick and fast …..Keep em coming….Buddy….yet another good one !!!!!
Jiggs – thanks, enjoy
lol
well, I thought your blog was only about serious politics, and here you come with one more of this politico-satire-fiction. Very cool.
Guys,
I hope I am not asking a dumb question, but can someone care to answer this:
” The left is saying that it will withdraw support of the govt decides to go ahead with the deal, now i read some where that the deal will go through and the govt will fall, here i am missing something, if left withdraws support the govt will fall, how can govt that cannot pass the floor test sign a deal??, it can only sign it if SP supports the deal and the govt. I am still confused, can someone explain”,
By the way, whatever are the intentions of the left in opposing the deal, for now, it is good if they dont sign the deal, i would not trust this govt with anything strategic.
Govt. does not need parliament’s support to sign the deal.
Yah but socal, the govt has to exist right, if the left withdraws, there is no government, i mean the UPA exists only if there are 272 MPS’s with them. the moment left withdraws MMS ceases to be the PM according to the constitution.
Hi Murali:
In the eyes of the world, a government is a government is a government – whether it is in minority or not. Meaning, as long as there is a PM and a cabinet, it can sign an international deal. And the country is bound by that deal. Whether a care taker / minority government should sign such a deal or not is more a question of morality and fairness but not that of it’s legal validity in the court of international law.
US has already said a long time ago that they will consider even a deal signed by a minority government as a valid one.
UPA government had said that it will take the sense of the House in to account. But, that does not mean it has to abide by it while signing an international deal.
#6
After left withdraws support there has to be a vote in parliament. This can take time. No one knows how much.
Even if MMS looses no confidence vote he can be a caretaker PM till the next elections are held–at least six months that is. He still can sign the deal during that time. Remember, the media is going to spin it hard in Congress’s favor if that happens.
The reason they want BJP to support it is because as a prospective govt. BJP can withdraw from the deal i.e., if it comes to power next time. BJP’s support is inconsequential to the passage of the deal at this time. It is required for continuation of the policy in future. That’s why all the cajoling by media and the sudden concern as to what the future will hold BJP responsible for etc.
I hope that BJP sympathizers raise the question as to why the media is so concerned over BJP’s nationalist image all of a sudden. Since when, really? And the answer gives their game away.
Also, let there be no doubt that BJP will have super tough time to actually get out of the agreement once the deal is are passed. You cannot wiggle out of deals with a superpower without consequences–heaven knows what. At stake will be a crucial strategic alliance that invariably is aimed at containing China. But yes, a determined nationalist govt. can always ask its people to sacrifice if it can convince them. Which is again why the BJP is being coaxed so desperately.
That is why, imo, the US is eager to have the deal even if by a minority govt. India’s best hope is to get a good deal–read, the one that keeps our strategic weapons program intact–rather than have buyer’s remorse. Not since we need the US to help us balance China and save ourselves in turn.
This deal is a one way street for practical purposes. We can end up with permanent second-class status with US and China playing superpower games. Without the weapons there is no place for India at the table in this great game.
@Murali….
#8/9 assesment is accurate….It has now dawned on my dumb ass, on why the BJP is staying aloof from this N deal drama, I read Advani saying that If BJP comes to power they will re negotiate the deal minus the clause barring further nuke testing.
Man….Politics …..It sucks….
“BJP favours strategic relations with the US”
http://www.indianexpress.com/story/326492.html
Which should be the case. One must not forget that US is a superpower and good relations with it ( including defence pacts) will help India immensely.
I believe one day Chinese are going to invade us again and we will require the worlds support to give the Han rascals back.
Failed PM: …Indeed, Sonia Gandhi has stayed the PM’s hand on the Indo-US nuclear deal more effectively than Manmohan Singh realizes, although it suits government managers, the Congress establishment, and cheerleaders in the media, to blame it all on the Left, and partly on the BJP. In the end, it has to do with keeping power.
Read the article in Indiareacts about Failed PM.
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